Thoey Opened for Dylan in '68

Snugget: do you like thois?

Haley: what's thois?

Snugget: (insert URL for ebay item here)

i meant 'this'

Jerk

Haley: ha

ooh yeah it's nice

Snugget: did you really think I meant thois?

Haley: eh i didn't initally, but then i thought maybe it was a band

If "When Harry Met Sally" Had Ended Differently

Robin: how was your new year?

Naomi: http://flickr.com/photos/danlikesbikes/sets/72157594452758634/

it was like that pretty much

how was yours?

Robin: im not fit to be a party girl

did you smooch anyone?

Naomi: just sam

then he went to a gay bar and fucked a stranger

i was just warm up

Robin: aww. does that mean you'll be gay in the new year?

Naomi: fingers crossed!

Miss Egination

Snugget: V and I bought Jbrands to share

Haley: ooh what color?

Snugget: Gingerbread

Haley: sweet

and seasonally appropriate
Snugget: yeah. I've been wanting brown guys for a while
(pause)
on second thought, that might have been the wrong time to revert to my habit of calling all things "guys"

The Legacy of Apartheid Ruins Another Marriage

me: The first gay couple to get married in South Africa wore safari outfits to their wedding! http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/6199922.stm

Haley: they are really cute despite the creepiness of being white south africans in safari outfits

me: I think being a white South African is creepy enough, regardless of your clothes

Distance Makes The Heart, And Libido, Grow Stronger

Robertoso christina was nice enough to pick me up, I bought toiletries at CVS and went out with them that night

and just stayed over and rode the metro back home, parents picked me up

Pierre: quite an excursion

Roberto: yea, kinda weird

Pierre: you should totally blog about it!

blogging is the hot new thing

Roberto: ha, I've heard!

Pierre: hotter and newer than social networking or music downloads

Roberto: I'd been gone from home for like 1.684 weeks straight

Pierre: but not as new as teledildonics

Roberto: yea, that's bleeeding edge

if you use it wrong

Bring Me a Cross, I Shall Nail Thyself To It

Tech Guy: god this is annoying

Office Guy: haha

why

Tech Guy: cause people are retarded

so much interference in the way of making a decision

Office Guy: hehe

Tech Guy: Now I know how Jimmy Stewart felt when he was a senator

Girl v. City, Round 1

Ana: i busted my face last night
Naomi: ha

on what?!

Ana: i walked into a fuckingTREE

Naomi: HAHAHAHAHA

Ana: i have a black eye!

and a cut on my cheekbone!

Naomi: city's dangerous, yo

Ana: LOL